It's often rumoured that Londoners are frequent cocaine users, with some sources suggesting the drug has contaminated tap water and even intoxicated the eels in the Thames.
This got me thinking: where are the strangest and most unexpected places cocaine users could be sniffing?
According to the Government, cocaine was the most used drug in London for the past five years, so is it really popular everywhere? Or is it only in nightclubs and bars that people want to use the Class A drug?
I decided to test some of London's most iconic attractions for traces of cocaine, and I was seriously surprised by the results.
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I found drug testing wipes on Amazon which said they could help me in my search for white gold. Four of the pink wipes, which turn blue when cocaine interacts with them, cost a tenner on the site.
With the equipment secured it was time to choose my venues for cocaine detection.
Kew Gardens was my first stop. I chose Kew out of pure coincidence: I was visiting already and really believed that no one would be doing cocaine in its peaceful and serene gardens.
It started as a joke with the friend I was with, and we just took the wipes for a laugh and experiment.
The wipes turning blue means traces of cocaine have been detected, and that is exactly what happened when I wiped them across the top of the toilet cistern inside the entrance bathrooms.
I was shocked, shouting to my mate in amazement.
The cocaine wasn’t visible, but the chemical reaction on the wipes detects even the smallest amount of the drug.
I'm not sure why these people needed the extra buzz for working their way through the gardens - I wish I could tell them the water lilies are nice enough without drugs.
Next up was a big one. It's a staple of the capital's skyline that survived the Blitz, but could even St Paul’s Cathedral be victim to serial sniffers?
I chose the cathedral because I thought that this would be an incredibly weird place to get high. I stand by this - I can’t see the attraction or reason for drug use under God’s watchful glare.
St Paul’s was the easiest place to test: the toilets were extremely private and it was really quiet.
I had no one to shout my amazement to this time, but instead I let out a little gasp as I realised the scent of candles wasn’t the only thing going up people's noses here. The wipes turned blue.
Nando's and the Tate Modern were the next victims of my exploration.
Everyone knows the music in the Nando's toilets is incredibly good, so maybe they were in the party mood?
According to my toilet test, plenty of cocaine traces were found in the toilet I chose at the Ealing Common Nando's.
The Tate Modern is known for its vibrant colours: Just like Nando's, you could be excused for getting party vibes.
The Tate is, however, not a nightclub but a place of class and culture.
Again, traces of cocaine were found, but despite this none of the people I had seen in the Tate looked as though they were even enjoying themselves, let alone on drugs.
I thought the positive cocaine test might have something to do with the Tate's middle-class clientele: Those who have an income of £50,000 or more are the biggest users of cocaine, according to a survey by the Office for National Statistics in 2018.
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I also tested the National Gallery, Tower Bridge and the London Eye for traces of cocaine, and they all came back negative.
Despite this, I still detected a fair amount of cocaine in London's biggest attractions. Nando's had the most cocaine, and Kew the least, according to the concentration of blue markings on my testing wipes.
But perhaps these results aren't too surprising: In 2019, scientists from King’s College studied 75 European cities and found London to snort more than any other, and it was estimated that Londoners collectively snorted 23kg of cocaine each day.
I just didn't expect people to do it in the picturesque Kew Gardens.
A spokesperson for St Paul’s said: “The toilets are open to all members of the public and used by a great number of people throughout the year.”
Kew Gardens declined to comment, while Nando's and the Tate did not respond to MyLondon's request for comment before publication.
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