This is Kelly Bensimon on the cover of Shape Magazine’s September issue. I’m pointing out the ID, because in real life, Kelly Bensimon looks nothing like this. In candid photos, she resembles Iggy Pop, in every possible way. They didn’t just Photoshop the ever-loving f–k out of her face and her stomach (her real stomach looks like THIS), but they also ‘Shopped her bolt-ons. I think that’s what upsets me the most. Kelly’s ‘Shopped Iggy Pop body is understandable, up to a point, but to magically give her natural-looking breasts? Wrong. Also, they gave her a defined waist! The real Kelly is thick-waisted, and mannish. If they’re going to do so much to her, why not just bite the bullet and put a Barbie doll on the cover? Anyway, the interview is just like you would imagine it to be – Kelly is one of the craziest bitches going:
Kelly defends her erratic behavior on RHONY (specifically addressing her St. John’s meltdown) saying: “People called me crazy, but what they saw was me reacting – in an honest way – to a situation that wasn’t honest. Then everyone ganged up on me. So of course I looked crazy.”
The fight with Bethenny Frankel: “People really thought I believed I was better than her, which is ridiculous. It wasn’t about social hierarchy but about her behavior. She called me a bad name, which I thought was fourth grade – like – hence the ‘down here‘ comment. Since then, I‘ve also called people bad named on the show. I‘m not proud of it, but it happens.”
She’s not on drugs: “Everyone always asks me why I wasn’t on the cocaine and vodka diet when I was a model. I was going to college and couldn’t be bombed out of my mind. My body is like a Ferrari. I know what it needs to run well and that doesn’t include drugs, alcohol, or cigarettes.”
She’s smart: “I find it hilarious when someone says I’m not smart. I’ve written three books, including American Style, a review of U.S. fashion, which is a textbook in some schools.”
[From Shape Magazine, print edition]
Bitch is cray-cray. There really is no doubt in my mind. I wonder if we should just designate Kelly some kind of “Britney Spears status” – like we can’t make fun of her anymore because she has a genuine mental illness? But unlike Britney, Kelly honestly doesn’t think she has a problem. Kelly thinks she’s fine. Nay, Kelly thinks she’s the brains of this whole operation. That just made me chortle.
Photos courtesy of Fame, Shape.
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